Oh, Canada. You lovely, lovely lady. I have fond memories of you, courtesy of both my parents- my mother took me to Vancouver and Victoria to celebrate my 25th birthday, just the two of us. I fell in love with your clean air and your friendly people. And my father? My father once forced us to go on the “Canada Ride” at Epcot in Disney World. And while it was possibly the worst attraction at Epcot Center (and that’s saying something), basically because all it entailed was shuffling a group of people into a room where we stood and watched pictures of Canada flash on screen for what felt like FOREVER (did I mention the STANDING?), I had to admit that the pictures of the moose and the flowers were very, very pretty. And while it took me about five years to even hear the word “Canada” again without laughing, I’m over it now and I can sit here and celebrate you with the best of them.
5 Awesome Things To Celebrate on Canada Day
5. This musical number
Sure, it’s mildly offensive. But it wouldn’t have been nearly as funny if it were about, say, Mexico. Because really, how can you blame Canada for ANYTHING?
4. Mike Myers (comedian not the murderer)
3. Canadian Whiskey
2. An 18 year-old drinking age
Ah yes. What better way to endear American youth than by promising them that if they come to Montreal for spring break, they can drink freely without fear of persecution. Less skanky and hot than Cancun and so much closer to those of us raised on the Puritanical East Coast.
1. Anne of Green Gables
To this day, when I find out someone else loves the Anne girl as much as I do, I feel instant kinship with them. It’s still on my list to see Prince Edward Island in person one day. But until Matthew picks me up from the train station, I’ve still got the books and possibly the most enduring mini-series ever made.