It’s hard for me to gauge exactly how dicey it’s getting back there in the U.S. Sure there have been jobs lost, yes. And that Dow keeps bopping up and down like a Beyonce dance number. Yeah, my hometown is on fire and apparently my dad has taken to wear a face mask when he walks outside. But I mean, it can’t be that bad, right?
And then I heard that my favorite Mother’s Circus Animal Cookies are going to CEASE TO EXIST because Mother’s, a 92 year old company, is another victim of the bad economy.
They were like the MOST special cookies I could ever get my hands on when released from the protective clutches of my organic-nazi parents. And even when I was a wanna-be anorexic in high school, I would sometimes go all day without food, just to be able to indulge in a snack pack of those pink and white lovelies. Sooo worth it.
I know, I know, breathe….it’s gonna be okay. Momma’s got a plan. Everyone go to foodlocker.com where you can still order the cookies en masse. Ollie and I are going to set up a very large time capsule/bunker, deep in the Arizona Desert, directions to follow. On determined date, we will converge, with all our sacred soon-to-be-obsolete foodstuffs and create a new world of our own. Don’t forget the batteries. Or the milk.
This is Debbie Downer, signing off.