A Little Writing Inspiration

I’m going to share one of my writing secrets. I find it most helpful when I’m working on fiction but I think it works for blogging as well. And there’s really no way for me to make this sound like anything but a straight-up commercial. I am Ron Popeil and this is my meat machine.

I used to listen to the straight-up classical stations on iTunes until I discovered StreamingSoundtracks.com. If you open iTunes and go to Radio > Classical, you should see it down there. (You can also go to their website but it’s terrible. Just…terrible. You’ll wonder if you’ve wandered into one of those scary D&D chat rooms from 1998. And then you’ll curse me.) This radio station is perfect if you’re anything like me and start imagining there’s a whip in your hand as soon as you hear the theme from Raiders. It’s uber helpful. And only slightly distracting when you hear music from “The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill but Came Down a Mountain” and then have to go to IMDB to remind yourself about how adorable Hugh Grant used to be.

In case you too had forgotten, here’s a little reminder.

I mean, really. This is so your British husband who works at a bank and spends all of his spare time in his pet project green house, holding potted plants and fretting over their moisture intake, and when your college friends come over for tea, he wanders in and out of the kitchen with wellies on, forgetting why he came in, absently giving you a kiss on the forehead and flashes a lopsided smile to your friends and then scratches his head and leaves and they all give you that look like “oh my god, he’s so adorable- How much do we hate you right now?” and you’re kind of smug and just drink your tea with your perfect blond hair and your matching sweater set and your friends suddenly remember why it’s been five years since they got together with you, since your wedding to Hugh in fact, and it was because you were ALWAYS like this, even in school when you’d drink three glasses of Chardonnay and make your boyfriend at the time take you to that dive poolhall in Connecticut where you’ll insult the busty townie who works at the nearby pizza parlor but is really, really good at pool and-

What were we talking about?

This entry was posted in Humor. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to A Little Writing Inspiration

  1. Persephone says:

    We were talking about why Hugh Grant broke all of our hearts by taking up with a skanky ho in L.A. like every other Hollywood cliche.

  2. Ollie says:

    Sigh. In my memory, he stops right at Four Weddings and a Funeral. Divine Brown is nothing more than the name of the eyeliner I use at our wedding in the English countryside.

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